Au revoir 2009

While watching Julie/Julia with a glass (or two) of Jackson Triggs Dry Reisling and some brie and prosciutto last night, I realized how terrible I've been at keeping this blog going.

I normally would say, life has gotten in the way, but if I'm honest with myself and you, it's that I haven't given it the time that it deserves. So, I write this post, as the last from the year it started as, not a farewell, but as a hello. The ending of one chapter, leading to another.

I'm not making "real" resolutions this year (like going to the gym more, or saving X amount of money), but I will try to be truer to myself than I've been so far. What's your New Year's resolution?

2009 was, I'll say, a "good" year (for all intensive purposes). I had some VERY happy times - times of love, excitement, and inspiration. There were times of sadness, anger, and disappointment. I've broken hearts and had my heart broken (not necessarily in the romantic sense). But with every incline and decline on this rollercoaster that we call life, I have learned something.

I've learned that I can't plan for everything, that I'm (somewhat) resilient, that I can love and be loved, that I respect and admire, and am respected and admired.

I've learned that money comes and goes, that happiness comes when you allow it to, and that family (including friends) don't hold grudges (thank you, and I'm sorry for all the silly things I've done). I've learned more about what I love and am passionate about. I've learned that I CAN bake, and if I try, I CAN cook. I've learned to write for myself, to sing like no one's listening, and to throw caution to the wind.

This year, loved ones passed on, loved ones got enganged, retired, or started new lives in their own rights.

Through all the happy and sad experiences my friends, family, and I have powered through this year, 2009 has been a good year. But, I hope 2010 is better, for everyone.

To all the people each of us has loved and lost, cheers to you.

Here's to a healthy, happy, prosperous 2010.

MONEEN RAW: Believe

While I was growing up, I was fixated on the indie music scene. Moneen is one of the bands I saw play on a variety of occasions and have always tried to follow through the years.

The recent release of their fourth full-length album, the world i want to leave behind, is an inviting amalgam of mature, fresh and classic sounds.

A friend just posted a link to this MTV News Raw Performance of Believe, and I thought I’d share the video:

NOT the End...

It's amazing how life works. This post is meant to inform you about what is happening in my life, but I think it has become more of a self-directed pep talk.

One week you're changing your life for an amazing opportunity, in a second the wind's been knocked out of you and you're on your ass.

Excuse my French, but I'm not too pleased at the moment. The job, that got me off my butt and moved me to Montreal, is no more.

So, needless to say, I'm unemployed and swinging lightly above rock bottom (at least what would be rock bottom for me - it's obviously different for everyone). However, I'm optimistic that something else will come along.

You can't have it all, right? It was almost too good to be true - the perfect job, the perfect city, and I almost even had the perfect apartment.

Now, I'm searching not only for jobs and more temporary accommodations, but also for myself. I'm torn, because I know some of my friends and family will want me to come home (although they won't say it), but I'm not ready, not yet.

It's incredible the emotion one goes through in a situation like this - shock, fear, sadness, anger, denial, resentment, and acceptance. Not necessarily in that order, but you catch my drift. Whenever you lose something that's dear to your heart, you have to go through the motions. Albeit brief, this chapter that I loved has come to an end, but I'm grateful to have had the experience, despite the outcome.

This still does leave me, to some extent, feeling empty. Like a tiny hole has been carved out of me. But it also leaves me with dreams. Dreams that I will work hard to fulfill. Dreams that I know will come true after some time and perseverance. I longed to live in this city for so long that I cannot let the dream dissipate that rapidly. I longed to be in a place that inspired me, allowed for breathing room and creativity, and that's exactly where I find myself.

I will take this free time to find something else that I love, something that will allow me to live this dream and grow as a person.

I will find my place - whether or not I'm doing what I expected, or what anyone else expected. I'm not ready to leave Montreal, so I'm putting my foot down! Montreal can't get rid of me that easily!

The Beginning...

So, it'll be two weeks tomorrow that I arrived at my new (temporary) apartment in Montreal. Since I can't seem ease myself into anything, I started my new job the morning after I arrived.

It has been a whirlwind two weeks, but it seems as though I'm settling in nicely. My lovely roommate is on exchange from France, so I'm lucky enough to work on my conversational French on a daily basis. Not only is she extremely nice and down to earth, she is a fantastic cook and has now made me lunch twice! I couldn't have asked for a better situation while I'm settling into my new position.

Our apartment is in a perfect spot, close to the metro, amazing restaurants, bars, and stores. Our kitchen is "petite", but it is perfect for two people. We have a comfortable dining room, and my room is large enough to essentially be a living room and bedroom all in one.

We live across the street from a beautiful park, where they've started putting up Christmas lights, giving it a somewhat romantic air, despite the barren trees. Besides the fact that I'm usually cold, I'm actually looking forward to the snow, positive that it will make everything around here look positively picturesque.

I must admit that not only was this an extremely exciting change to take on, it was also extremely terrifying. However, since the moment I arrived, I have not experienced an ounce of regret. I, of course, would not have been able to make the move (literally) without my mother and my "big sister." They were a great help - driving me down, helping me move in and organize, and offering support and encouragement every step of the way. Support and encouragement was also plentiful from the rest of my family and friends. It has also been very refreshing to meet so many wonderful new people, who, in addition to more encouragement, have offered an immense amount of advice and hospitality. Thank you all.

I will do my best to post as often as possible going forward, but as I'm still adapting to my new surroundings and position, and looking for a permanent apartment, I cannot make any promises.

In the meantime, below are links to some bands/musicians (some that I have mentioned in the past) that played on Saturday night at Le Divan Orange:

Chasing Bright Lights

Hugh Manns

Cavaliers

Mike Hale

Austin Lucas (or: http://www.austinlucasmusic.com)

Colin Moore

BIG Move

Since it’s been just about a month since my last post, I thought it might be time to explain why I’ve been MIA.

As I’m sure you’ve noticed, I love Montréal. Over the past few years, I’ve

thought often about living there, but fear always got the best of me. “Fear of what?” some people have asked. Fear of the unknown? Fear of change? Fear of failure? To be honest, I’m not really sure what I was afraid of.

I made some choices this summer to do the things I’ve always wanted to do, so I began seriously exploring the possibility of making this move.

I was recently offered an amazing opportunity at an incredible, quickly growing company. Without hesitation, I said yes. This meant, however, that I had to give notice at my other position, find a place to live, sort out my finances, pack up and move, in just over two weeks.

So, I have a place to live (albeit temporarily), I’m almost done packing, and besides being exhausted and a little bit terrified, I am beyond excited to start this new chapter in my life.

I will do my best to post more often and offer you some insight into my new world in Montréal.

À bientôt!

J'♥ Montréal

There’s something about meeting a friend for a cappuccino at a quaint French café, something about cobblestone streets, something about the arts and music. For me, there’s just something about Montreal. 

My train ride into the city landed me beside a very intriguing young gentleman who showed great interest in “my numbers.”  I’m not talking about phone numbers, I’m talking about numerology.  If that’s not unusual enough to some, J.P., let’s call him, charted my numbers on a VIA Rail barf bag.  

He explained that I’m a very spiritual person – but not necessarily in the religious sense, that I’m very creative, and that I’m a nurturer.  Strange, but those who know me best would say that pretty much sums me up. 

He told me this is my “Buddha” year, my year to “build the foundations” of my life.   It seems as though that’s what I’m doing, albeit, subconsciously. 

As I sat on another (much more comfortable) train five days later, I watched the amazing city disappear as the train pulled away and felt a twinge of sadness. 

 

Let me tell you why: The city exudes brilliance, a unique, contagious creativity that spurs happiness and inspiration within me.  I have some wonderful friends who call Montreal home, and every time I visit, I am lucky enough to meet lots of new, wonderful people. 

My mini vacation was filled with great food, great company, some pretty good wine (and some not so good), fun house parties, and fabulous bars with lots of outstanding music.  For the second time in the last few months, I failed to play tourist and pretended that Montreal was home.

I spent time at a few different cafés, ate at some great restaurants, bought groceries, and cooked a lovely meal in the lovely apartment I was staying in.  I sat on a terrace and wrote, reflected.  I ‘people-watched’ from a park bench and the steps of a café.  I read.  I danced.  I practiced my French.  I laughed.  I played piano. I saw lovers, children, students, men and women, each writing their own stories, shaping their futures.  Each doing exactly what I was doing – living.   

Merci, Montreal.   

Jeff Hutchens

In March, Photo District News (PDN) came out with their top 30 emerging photographers to watch for this year.
Jeff Hutchens recently caught my eye with this photograph.

While I sit inside on a lazy, rainy Saturday, comforted by the thought of being in Montreal, this photograph made me daydream of an afternoon stroll in an ancient European village.

http://www.jeffhutchens.com/contents.html